Written by the girl who is now 4 minutes healthier.

This week marks the start of 20 Second Fitness for Tom and I.

If it weren't for the fact that my sister and brother-in-law did it last year (they were actually part of a test group for it—and they were in the infomercial for it...remember?? Oh, and they gave it to us for Christmas) and ended up looking like super models with buns of steel by the time they were done, I would be pretty darn skeptical about it. I mean—it's a four minute workout. Four minutes. Well, I think it works up to more, I'm not really sure. I'll have to check with Mitzi and get back to you.

Now you're just as skeptical as ever too, huh? Four minutes, you say, with a cynical scoff and a flip of the hair. But shoot—it's worth a try, right?? I can do anything for four minutes. Plus, I love to avoid the gym as much as humanly possible. (Or in my case, our area's "Rec Center," which isn't exactly classy enough to hold the "gym" title.) Most especially in January. Ugh. It doesn't matter what time you go—it's always bursting with people and machines are never available. It usually clears out by mid February though, and then it's manageable.

Anyway, we're only in the first week of warm ups, but we're both already sore. Carting Clara around is a bit more of a task than it was last week, because my arms feel like they need to fall off. Not bad for a four minute workout, no?

Here's the concept behind it. Intensity. Speed. No such thing as "pacing" here. Indeed, these are the keys to unlocking your metabolic super powers. (That line just came flowing out of me like I'm some sort of poet or something.) I'm pretty sure so far I'm nailing it because after my workout yesterday and this morning I kind of thought I might throw up. Anyway, you do 20 seconds of jumping jacks, push ups, shoulder raises, squats, yadda yadda yadda, at the highest intensity you can possibly muster, and then take a break (10 seconds) and start up with something new for 20 seconds (at the highest intensity known to man). Cycle repeats until the four minutes are up. I've learned that a good way to know if I've done it right is if I'm wheezing by the time I'm done. No wheeze? Try harder next time. It's a nice system.

Anyway, since I'm on the topic, here is a list of some other things I like to do (or have done in the past) to try to keep in shape. I don't profess to be any sort of expert on health and fitness. In fact, I'd like to publicly profess that I like to cut corners as much as I can—hence—a FOUR minute workout. Anyway, these seem to work well for me.

• Spinach. Lots of it. I don't ever buy lettuce—only spinach. I do my best to have some each day. I swear it makes a huge difference. Just like what's-his-bucket preaches.

• Back in high school, my friend Brittany once swore off soda for an entire year. I remember we all looked on in awe and wonder as she actually did it. Several other of our friends agreed to do it too, but weren't as passionate about it. (Yeah, you know who you are—you with your quick, sneaky swigs of Orange Soda in a dark corner of the Centennial cafeteria and your desperate pleas of "Don't tell Brittany!" when I happened upon you that fateful day....) Anyway. Although I haven't sworn it off entirely, I don't usually drink soda anymore either. If I really want some I go for it. But usually now I have soda so rarely that when I do drink some, it usually burns my mouth and throat the whole way down and I can feel it eating at my insides. If I have a few days when I drink quite a bit of it I usually end up feeling like I've been consuming leftovers from a dumpster, so for me it feels wonderful to go without.

• I don't buy brownie, cake and cookie mixes unless I absolutely need them for a special occasion. That way, when the late-night munchies hit and Tom or I start rummaging through the cupboards and can't find anything to appease ourselves, we usually just give up. Because if you don't have the easy way out, then you have to mull over whether you actually want to go to the work to start cracking eggs and measuring baking powder and pouring vanilla and mixing up sugar and flour in a bowl and making a big mess in the kitchen, and well, what I'm saying is laziness usually takes over. Then you either settle on something totally lame like baby carrots, or you just go to bed hungry and you've forgotten all about your troubles by the next morning.

• Also on that note, I try my darndest to not eat after 8 p.m. This is particularly ironic of me to say, because last night Tom came home from work to find me chowing down on chips and salsa at 10 p.m. But anyway. I try.

• A lot of people choose lighter dressings or just have their dressing on the side of a salad. Not me. I usually go the other way and engulf my salads in the most fattening ranch dressing I can get my hands on. My love of ranch dressing dates back to the dawn of man. Anyway, a few weeks ago when we were in Las Vegas for Christmas, I discovered that my mom has started making homemade ranch dressing instead of buying it in the bottle. She pointed out that a: it's cheaper. And b: it's healthier because it doesn't come with all the preservatives. And as we all know, homemade ranch dressing is about a zillion times tastier. It's a win-win-win. I shall adopt this practice as well.

• In the weeks leading up to our wedding, I went on a 85% soup diet. It wasn't so much a conscious decision as it was the quickest and simplest method of keeping myself nourished amid last minute wedding plans and packing up my belongings to move into our new apartment. But that, along with lengthy gym outings, (I had some extra time because I had unexpectedly lost my job three weeks before our wedding) made for a loose wedding dress on the morning of. I couldn't believe it. Now, I wouldn't exactly condone this to be a lifestyle habit, but the idea is always floating around in the back of my mind if I feel the need to shed a few lb's in a hurry.

There now. Those are my ideas and I'm hoping to hear some of yours. But I'm looking for the easy methods for staying in shape. None of that marathon-running business. What are some of the cut-corner tricks you've got up your sleeve? Do share. I'm biting my fingers off in anticipation.

Oh, and if Tom and I happen to start looking like super models, the blogdom will be the first to know. But now if you'll excuse me, I do believe there are some leftover Christmas M&M's in our kitchen who are in need of some attention.





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UPDATE: I have since learned, that yes—20 Second Fitness works up to TWELVE minutes. Whew. This is big.